Tuesday, September 10, 2013

His Gift

You know how you can read the Bible over and over again and every time learn something new? It seems like no matter how well I know a certain passage, there is always something new to discover. While studying Genesis 2 a few weeks ago, I saw something I had never really noticed or thought about before. And it has rocked my world.

For years I have had this idea that I am supposed to be waiting for my wonderful prince to come. I have always imagined him coming into my life and being just perfect for me. I have looked forward to meeting this man, the man who was made to be my husband. How self-centered is that? When I saw Genesis 2:22 and realized my error, I was disgusted with my own selfish attitude. This is what it says...

And the rib, which The LORD God had taken from man, made He a woman, and brought her unto the man.

I have had everything so backwards! This verse has showed me that I am not to wait for my man to come to me. Instead, I am to wait for God to bring me to him the same way He brought Eve to Adam. My future husband was not made for me. I was made for him.

That is not all I have learned from this passage though. What God showed me next brought me to tears. For you to understand why this is so significant, I need to tell you a little bit about myself...

The past several years, I have struggled with lies.
Lies like:
You're a failure.
You will never be beautiful inside.
Nobody wants you.
You are a horrible person.
You don't even deserve to live.
There are hundreds more just like those and they are all just as ugly. If anything ever goes wrong, I am the first person I blame. I have a very low opinion of myself and think that everything bad is my fault. I have called myself garbage, I have hated myself, I have believed every lie that has been thrown at me. Praise God, this year has been better and I am so thankful to have freedom! This does not mean I no longer struggle though. Sometimes the lies still come to haunt me. I still have to fight them. But when the darkness comes, the Lord will always show me something in His Word and let me know that I am beautiful to Him. Last month, He showed me Genesis 2:22. Read it again...

And the rib, which The LORD God had taken from man, made He a woman, and brought her unto the man.

Do you see that? The woman was God's gift to the man, created especially for him. I am not a worthless piece of trash. I am a beautiful treasure. I am a gift. Years ago, my parents chose a name for me and I believe it was no mistake. They named me Jessica, "gift". My very name is a reminder to me now of who I am. Of who God made me to be.

No longer do I picture a princess gazing out the castle window, waiting for a dashing prince on a white horse to come for her. I see a precious gift being formed and perfected by the hands of God Himself, to be presented at the perfect time to a very special man.

The man I was created for.

2 comments:

  1. omisoul. sister. I think sometime last year I have this very same light bulb moment. So felt your heart in this post ((hugs)) love you more today!

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  2. I tried to comment on this when you first posted it. But, it must not have went through. Anyways, I want you to know how proud I am of you. It takes guts to let your insides out (that was a disgusting sentence) - but you're the gutsiest girl I know. I also know there is a special man waiting on you, but even if you never met him (not likely) this man *points at self* is incredibly blessed with a sister like you. I love you lil sis. You're the coolest!

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