Great Joy

This week, I want to encourage you to get into the Bible. I mean really get into it. One of the best things you could ever do is commit the Word of God to memory. Over the last month or so, I have concentrated on learning large portions of Scripture and I can tell you there is something sweet about being able to quote chapter after chapter for a solid half hour.

I have always hated the fact that when I am doing my hair and makeup, that is all I am doing. Now, I am able to quote different passages and keep them fresh in my mind while I get ready for the day. More and more, I find myself quoting verses when I am exercising or working in the kitchen or driving somewhere. What better way to keep my thoughts on the things of God than to be constantly speaking the words God authored?

One of the greatest joys of knowing Scripture I discovered a couple of nights ago. My little brothers love when I come and tell them a story before bed. So Sunday night, I crawled onto Christian's bunk and began telling stories of Jesus from the first chapter of Mark. Zach joined us and was completely amazed at my ability to remember all forty-five verses. I hope he was inspired to learn just as many, because I want him to have the same joy. And I want you to have that joy too.

I won't lie to you. It is a lot of work. And if you don't do it every day, you will forget. You may have a little difficulty finding time in your busy schedule, but I found that by staying up just a little later at night and reading other books less, I have a good amount of time for the Word. And while I am thinking about it, let me go ahead and say that we have things backwards. We should not be trying to fit God into our hectic lives. He should be our life. Everything else we do is just extra and if it doesn't fit into the schedule, so what? When it comes to the Lord, you ought never have the excuse, "I didn't have time".

So, evaluate your priorities and make those necessary changes. Realize what is truly important and strive for those things with every ounce of your determination. I promise you, it is worth it.

Steffanie

This week I want to tell you about a woman who has inspired me in many ways. A woman I am privileged to have as my "big sister".

Before Steffanie married my brother, Caleb, last year, she told a dear friend of ours that she wanted to start having children right away. This well meaning friend told her that she needed to wait and they should get to know each other better and have fun for a year or two first. Many people hold this opinion and I personally find it disgusting. How sick to think of children as a burden. How ridiculous to think they would rob you of your joy in marriage. Steffanie has had an earful of negative, degrading comments in regards to her desire for children. I have to say, I am very proud of her for ignoring them all and holding to her convictions. She and Caleb married last October and had twin boys in July. She continues to hear the rude, sarcastic remarks from people who either think they are being funny or just have absolutely no clue what a wonderful gift God has given to her. And she answers them all politely and with a smile. Wow. Oh, that I could have a sweet spirit like that.

Watching her care for her children in her new role as a mother has been so much fun. Her ability to care for her entire family all at once is nothing short of impressive. I have seen her hold both boys, drink from a cup, and rub her husband's back at the same time! You would have to see it to believe it. There are many things that she no longer has time for, like doing her hair or cooking fancy meals, but she takes care of what is most important. Caleb and the boys are her priority and that is how it should be.

But as busy as she is with her new family, she always has time for me. Those quiet times when she could be doing something for herself for once, she comes to me and offers encouragement and companionship- both of which I really need right now. She has a heart for people and I love to see it. This woman always seems to know what to say and when to say it or even when nothing needs to be said at all. What blesses me the most is that she doesn't just have compassion for me when I am hurting, she cries with me. How beautiful it is to see Jesus in her!

She is such a wonderful example of what a wife and mother should be. I believe it is because of her relationship with the Lord. When her family toured with us last week, she and Caleb asked if we could watch the boys so they could have Bible study together. Not a romantic date. They wanted time in the Word. Romance in marriage is important, but seeking the Lord together is paramount. If only more people understood that. I am so glad to see Steffanie and Caleb setting this example for so many young people. They are not afraid of censure. They simply obey God and He has blessed them with a happy home.

Steffanie is a great role model for any young lady. I don't know about you, but when I grow up, I want to be just like her.

The Duty of a Daughter

This week, God has taught me more about what my relationship with my father should look like. Daddy and I have always gotten along really well. I do not remember ever having an argument with him or being mad at him. Ever. I have loved him, respected him, admired him, and looked up to him for over two decades. However, I do not confide in him the way I should. I do not always seek his counsel and approval. I have not been his prayer warrior. I have not made serving him and helping him my priority. Though I live under his protection and authority and I support him in his ministry, I have not fully embraced my role as his daughter. I have not made an effort to submit my will to him. I have not fully given him my heart.

But I want to.

My parents raised me in such a way that all of these ideas are natural to me, but up until now, I had not made them my own, deliberate decisions. I know that my life's purpose does not begin at marriage. I am preparing diligently for marriage, but I have a duty to perform right now, while I am yet single. My calling is to be my father's helper. My purpose is to help him fulfill his calling.

Sounds like great practice for marriage, doesn't it? God designed the father/daughter relationship this way for a reason. A woman is not supposed to be independent; she is to be always dependent on a man. While she is single, this man is her father. And her father will one day transfer his authority over her to the man she will call husband. What a beautiful, natural transition!

So many women go through unnecessary struggle because they are living out their single years as independent individuals and then they marry and have to learn submission and respect. Submitting to a man is very difficult for a person who has never done it before. Years of ministry are wasted because women have not already learned how to be wives. They are obstacles to their husbands, hindering them and holding them back from all God has for them. This can be avoided simply by realizing that we were never meant to be self-reliant, self-sufficient females. In the very beginning, God created woman for man. She is his helper. It is her purpose.

This is not meant to be a drudgery. Contrary to what many people believe, living out God's design brings unimaginable joy. I am sure it breaks His heart to watch us ignore His plan and try to live out our own. If only people could see what they are missing! My prayer for each of you is that you will embrace His purpose for your life and encourage others to do the same. And may your joy in doing this be sweet. As mine is.

Choices

I have been getting some complaints because I did not post last week. My apologies. You see, last Tuesday, I was taking care of my nephews. Definitely my best excuse so far! Never fear, I shall now return to my "normal" schedule. Thank you for listening.

As singles, we tend to live a little selfishly. Even being the oldest sibling at home and caring for the little ones every day, the choices I make are still selfish ones. The way we use our free time, the way we spend our money, and the way we treat our bodies are all decisions that, for the most part, affect only us.

While money spending is not a problem for me, I do have selfish tendencies in other areas. I watch a lot of movies and spend an exorbitant amount of time exploring Pinterest. I also eat more cookies than are necessary (yes, cookies are necessary) and put too much butter on everything. I have my own agenda and often choose to do things my way without paying any attention to anyone else. I am a single woman and, although I still live under my father's roof where I am supposed to be, I tend to live a little independently. But I have heard for many years and have observed for myself that when independent single people enter marriage, life becomes about somebody other than themselves. Suddenly, every decision made has an effect on their spouses and children. And they live differently.

God has taught me much over the past two months, primarily on the subject of preparing for marriage. There have been some interesting lessons and one in particular I would like to share here. I propose to you the idea that the choices we make as singles already affect our future spouses and children. This concept has changed my life.  Here's how...

1) The way I use my free time.
There is nothing wrong with the things I used to do in my free time. I actually still do those things on occasion. But I realize that this time can be better spent and so I now use it to study and learn things that will benefit my future family. For example, I am currently studying herbal remedies so I will be properly equipped to care for the health of my family. I aim to be familiar with a wide variety of subjects so as to be able to teach my children well. There is so much information available to me and I feel it would be unwise to ignore it all. Knowledge is such a wonderful thing and my free time can be spent pursuing it with the intent of being useful to my family.

2) The way I spend my money.
 I have already said that this area is not a problem for me. I rarely buy anything for myself and when I do, I make sure I am getting the best deal possible. The only reason I go shopping at all is to be with friends and I hate making any shopping expedition by myself. But I think it would be a good practice to learn how to make money go further when buying groceries for a family. My mother has taught me a lot about this and I think I do a pretty good job of it, but there is always room for improvement.

3) The way I treat my body.
This area is the one that has changed me the most. A few years ago, I was very sick and unable to be active at all. Ever since then, I have not been in very good shape, physically. Sometimes, I would make an effort to exercise regularly, but it never became a habit (it really is a difficult thing to accomplish when you live on a bus). And as far as eating habits go, I pretty much just eat what I want. My parents raised a bunch of healthy eaters and we all love our veggies, but my problem is an insatiable sweet tooth. I recently came face to face with the fact that these kinds of choices could hurt my future children. My body is where they will spend the first months of their lives and I am now determined to create a safe and healthy environment for them. And not only that, but as a mommy I need to be in better shape to carry those kiddos around everywhere (I learned this while caring for my nephews last week). I find it is much easier to get out and exercise and even to say no to the extra cookies when I think of my future babies.

So...what new decisions can you make to prepare for your future family?

A Memorable Experience

Y'all, I got nothin' this week. Blame it on a busy weekend, but I have nothing profound or deeply spiritual for you today. After a little consideration, I have decided to tell you a story. A true story. This really actually for real happened to me...

My family and I went on a missions trip to Jamaica about two years ago with Price Harris Ministries. Our first evening there, the team gathered together and, after briefing us, our leader told us to pray that God would give each of us a memorable experience. Something we could tell others about for the rest of our lives. So I prayed and the very next day, God gave me that memorable experience.

It was a gorgeous sunny day and we went out on the streets of the city to tell people about Jesus. My family sang for a while to draw a crowd and then one of the preachers got up to speak. When he was finished, everyone split up to pass out tracts and talk to people one on one. I walked across the street with some of the ladies from our team and then it happened. All of the ladies were off talking to different people and a police officer approached me. 

"Is everything okay over here?" he asked.

I was all by myself and had no clue what this was about or if we were in trouble or something. So I simply said, "Yes, everything is fine."

"Where are you from?"

"We are from the United States," I answered.

His next question was wholly unexpected. "Are you single or married?"

I was startled and wondered why he would ask such a question. I figured I should probably just tell the truth so I said, "Single".

He didn't stop there. "How old are you?"

Oh, boy. This was starting to get awkward. "I am eighteen," I told him.

"That is legal age to be married."

"WHAT?!"

"Eighteen. Eighteen is legal age to be married." 

"Uh...o-kay." It was really hard to tell what he was thinking behind his sunglasses, but I wasn't liking where this conversation was headed.

"So...do you want to get married?"

Seriously? I laughed, nervously. "Yes. One day I would like to get married." 

"You want to marry me?" He was grinning now.

I laughed maybe a little too much at that. "No!" I told him.

"Why? Because I am black?"

Oh, great. Now he thinks I'm racist. I gave the best answer I could. "No...I just don't know you."

He leaned forward and lowered his voice, "Do you want to get to know me?"

Okay, time to change subject! I avoided the question altogether and asked instead, "Do you know Jesus?" 

I invited him to come to our concert and then took my leave. Before I turned to go, he touched my arm and said, "I like you." 

That, my friends, is the story of my first marriage proposal. Needless to say, I am still single. Next time I pray for a memorable experience, I may need to be a little more specific! 

I learned two things through this. First, never go anywhere without a man that you trust (like Daddy). Second, it's okay to say no. If he ain't the one, don't lead him on. Don't feel sorry for him and worry about hurting his feelings. Just say no and continue to guard your heart and keep it for one man. The man who will treasure it forever. 

One day, another man will propose to me and God will say, "This is the one I created you for." I will say "yes" for all the right reasons and then together we will share a lifetime of memorable experiences. 

And so with that in mind, I pray each of you will have a memorable experience as well.

Lessons Learned

Yes, I am perfectly aware that I skipped last week. If you will recall, I said I would "make a valiant attempt" to post every Tuesday. And I did make one such attempt last week. I failed. Thank you for listening.

For the past month, I have been very earnestly and diliberately preparing for marriage. Ever since I was thirteen years old, I have known that my single years were to be used for this preparation, but never have I been so diligent about it as I am now. A few weeks ago, I felt this sense of urgency to ready myself and become better equipped for the man to whom God will give me. I am now walking a path that tests my faith daily. Difficulties arise without warning, fear tries to grab me, doubt wants to get in, and temptation lies in wait around every bend, yet my trust in Jesus has not wavered. He has been doing many wonderful things in my life as a result and I can honestly say this is the greatest experience I have ever had.

So precious to me is my relationship with my Lord! It is truly sweeter than it has ever been before. He has been changing me and conforming me to his own image, He has answered my prayers, He has listened to me and comforted me, He has taught me His ways. He has done all of this and He continues to do these things. I see His hand on my life every day. Every moment. He has given me joy, humility, discernment, and a greater hunger for His Word. I love what He is teaching me and would like to share some of those things with all of you. 

I have learned to be thankful for my mother. I know that sounds silly, but moms are so underrated. How often have you taken yours for granted? God has helped me to realize just how important my relationship with my mom is and He has taught me to appreciate her. Honestly, I have no clue how I could have gotten through some of the hardships of the past weeks without her guidance and encouragement. My gratitude for the parents God gave me cannot possibly be expressed by mere words. I know my weaknesses. I know what kind of life I would be living without my godly upbringing. I could have been born to anyone, but of all the couples in the world, the Lord chose to give me to Todd and Michelle Allen. Wow. 

I have also learned to pray. Really pray. Here's another excerpt from my journal...

"I want to be a prayer warrior. There are battles to be fought and I want to fight them. I see needs every day. Countless people who need healing, encouragement, comfort, strength, hope, courage, mercy, salvation. Why am I not speaking to my Father daily on their behalf? I have never been very faithful in praying for people. Or praying at all. This is unacceptable. I wonder how many blessings I have missed by neglecting to pray. How many blessings have others missed?"

Think about that last question for a minute before you continue reading.

The final lesson I want to share with you is this: I have learned to wait. Waiting is probably the most difficult thing God asks us to do. It is so easy to get frustrated and try to write my story myself. But I know I can trust Him. I know that at the right time, at the right place, and in the right way, God will bring me to the right man. When I focus on serving the Lord with my whole heart, He becomes my love and it is so much easier to wait when I am holding His hand. He has this. I trust Him.

I hope these things have encouraged you today. My prayer is that God will use my life to bring Him honor and to be a blessing to others. He has great things in store for you, you know. A close walk with Him is the most important thing you can develop before marriage. Spend some time with Him and allow Him to teach you. Put all of your plans and goals off to the side for a little while and just sit in His presence. Learn to be thankful for His gifts. Learn to pray for His people. Learn to wait for His timing. If you seek Him with your whole heart, He will reveal Himself to you.

I know He will.

The Heart of a Servant

This week, I would like to tell you about an amazing young lady I am honored to know. She is sixteen years old, but she has the wisdom and maturity of one twice her age. She is elegant, graceful, and feminine in the way she acts, speaks, and dresses. Nothing says "lady" like her deportment does. She has a wonderful personality uninhibited by the opinions of others because what people think makes no difference to her. She is also a blonde through and through, which makes her a wonderful target for teasing and laughing at...I mean, with. She is beautiful, talented, a great student, a wonderful companion, and she loves life.

There are so many good things I can say about this girl, but the quality she possesses that inspires me the most is her servant's heart. When there is work to be done, she is the first to volunteer and the last to complain. She is constantly looking for ways to help and is truly selfless in the way she reaches out to people. Never taking thought for herself, she puts her whole heart into serving others. Though she is the most loyal friend and is always there when someone needs her, she is often overlooked and unappreciated. Yet she continues to serve. There is nothing that can prevent her from doing what she does best. Her deep passion for Jesus and her desire to show His love to others are made obvious in her willingness to lay down her own wants and agenda in order that she may be His hands and feet to all those around her.

Oh, that I could be like her! Oh, that I too could represent my Master in the beautiful way that she does! My own selfishness is brought to light daily as I watch her esteem others better than herself.  I believe everyone can learn from the shining example she sets forth. Her impact upon my life has been great and I know there are many more who can say the same. She is truly a blessing to all who know her and I am so proud to have her for my sister.

I love you, Danielle!